unable to explain

[Tangled Web]

Tweeter this post is AMAZING!
Some of the thoughts we have......in response to it.......
The logic is different. Child logic is less verbal and close to our neurological/animal sp*r*t….. This is very true and I can see that much more clearly now.
That's because you've got it turned around. You need to bring the logic of the past world (on its own terms) into the present. In doing this, I tend to not use the word "logic." I just let it happen. The way I am. Neurologically and in experience, they can be two different worlds, a schism encouraged by the dominant factions of society, which regard the aboriginal rooted as competition, and so make it ineffectual or destroy these people outright
I guess in bringing the logic into the past is our way of trying to change the past, maybe…… To find some way of understanding why the things that were done to us were done.(Adult logic and child’s logic apply here only they are very conflicted which I understand why they are now) Trying to find some rational explanation and if we could do that then maybe we could see that our parents really did love us and somehow we have misinterpreted things.(struggling with denial and feeling like we have done something wrong to deserve this through the child’s eyes) Trying to change the things that went wrong go right…….Isn’t that every child’s dream?

As hard as it is, you need to do more than "standing in my past." You can't do as you wish because you're in the child's mental landscape, not yours. This child's reality does not include the good stuff. It only includes what was. I don't know what it takes to make the transition you speak of, and then what to do about the grief the little will experience when understanding occurs. I don't know if my idea is relevant, but it was worth trying.
I agree with you, standing in the past is not enough now. That makes so much sense to us! Very well put and thank you for the words we could not find, you described it perfectly here.
Bringing the past out into the present…..looking at it now through their eyes and just talking off the cuff here but thinking what that would like that. They would have to come out and talk about that……and in order to do that there would have to be some acceptance and not judging what they say or trying to correct their thoughts on the matter. In correcting their thoughts is like denying them their reality and that is what I guess we jump to right away. We need to let them have their reality and listen to it and understand it, accept it, maybe even validate it before we try to change it. Does that make sense? I think it might. So it looks like we are missing a whole bunch of steps in this process and just jumping to the end……..trying to change something that really isn’t ours to change and in doing that we are invalidating their experiences. No wonder why they never want to talk……..

We now have a lot more things to think about but at least the direction we are going in fits and makes a heck of a lot more sense to us. Thank you.