Got subpoena to testify; freaked out for a while

[WeAreKaren]

I belatedly opened a letter this morning, which turned out to be a subpoena to testify against a man who came into my house back in March. It was just last month that I finally felt safe enough to leave the doggie door unbarred when I left the house without my dog (so she could sun herself in the yard). So of course we all freaked out after reading the subpoena.


I calmed us down, posted on another forum I belong to, talked to a couple of friends, and distracted us with a yard project and such. I've been telling myself this is not a movie. A burglar is not going to come after me for testifying against him. Especially since he ran away when I yelled at him to get out. But it's hard to be rational after what happened, especially after the year I've had (sudden breakup, discovering I have DID, spontaneous memories popping out, etc.) Oh my, the universe just keeps on challenging me. (Or giving me opportunities, as my therapist would say.) Karen Rose

[nats]

hi Karen Rose, sounds like you handled it really well. it would definitely be scary. it always seems like life gives us just that bit more than we feel at all comfortable dealing with! Hope it all goes well.

[MakersDozn]

Agreeing with nats. Sounds like you're doing a great job. Perhaps one of your others is worried? How is your internal communication?

Good luck with testifying.

MDs

[WeAreKaren]

Thanks, nats and MakersDozn. As regards MakersDozn's question, yes we have pretty good communication amongst the current batch of parts. (I'm poly-fragmented and have been going through a huge amount of parts discovery, consolidation, and change, and getting better and better at co-communication since discovering I have DID a bit over a year ago.)

We're not worried so much as stirred up, which is absolutely understandable. It was a very scary thing that had never happened to us before. Plus it happened only a few months after being suddenly dumped out of a 16-year relationship on the day we started therapy for what I (the host) thought was PTSD from bullying in middle school and junior high. And only a few weeks later I realized I had DID (after subtle "pointing in the right direction" by my therapist). Any one of those alone would create issues with feeling safe. And having a man come into one's house would scare and cause safety issues for anyone - especially a female living alone and even more so a female survivor. So you put all those factors together, it was a very disturbing experience. The arrival of the subpoena stirred our safety issues back up again.  Karen Rose (Host) 

[The People]

Hi Karen Rose. I wrote something but forgot to hit send. Is there someone that could go to court with you? In some communities there re court appointed victims advocates who might be able to go with you. Perhaps you could check with the office that sent you the paper and see if they are aware of any of this. I am glad you are in a place where you can speak up. That would be very powerful.

[WeAreKaren]

Good suggestion, The People. I'll keep that in mind as an option. My therapist is going to write a letter explaining that I would be re-traumatized if I were to testify in person, and asking if I can send a report. I'm only a year into learning about my DID and I'm still in very shaky shape given everything that has happened over the past year, so that seems adviseable. But if that doesn't succeed, perhaps they would have a court-appointed victim's advocate who could provide me with some support.