It has only taken 25 years or so

[Tangled Web]

I agree with what you are saying here nats. Life IS to be lived, not just avoided till we're healthy enough to do it properly.
The way we see it though ..........isn't in terms of "getting better", for us it is about healing the wounds that were caused. That best way I know how to describe it is when you have a wound on your skin or on your body somewhere and it might be infected, what do you do with it? You take care of it and try to get it to heal. I see it the same way as the our wounded soul, spirit or whatever you want to call it. The only thing is that we need to be taught how to heal it because we don't know how. It isn't as easy as going to a doctor and get an antibiotic, there are no magic pills for this. But the wounds do heal and they form a scar and the scars do fade with time, but they will always be there. That is what I see happening Igraine. People can integrate and work really hard at doing that but you never forget how to split, or dissociate, just like you don't forget where you got the scars from. I can understand how hard it is to hear though after someone has worked so hard to become "one" and then have it all fall apart again.
Just like I agree with you when you say "Waiting around for it to improve is a hopeless waste of time." I don't think anyone should "just wait around" imo healing is something we do for ourselves, it has to be worked at and waiting for it happened is a sure way of it not happening, but working at it is a almost a guarantee that it will happen. I truly believe that. I am glad you are going to get yourself moving forward and finding a way to live with this. Some days that is all we can do. Just make it through the day........and I try to remind myself ALL the time that the sun will come up again and it will be a new day. There is hope. At least that is what we(as in myself) have to believe.
TW