Loss

[Tangled Web]

(05-26-2012, 08:46 AM)ELL Wrote: I feel a bit funny posting here since I'm a completely new member to Mosaic Minds, and this forum has nothing in it and my post will be the first. But I guess I'll go ahead anyway.

In January of this year our father died. He was a really good Dad, and we miss him terribly. I've spent the past four months dissociating a lot from the reality of his death. I'll do just about anything other than think about the fact that he's gone, and my system mates are the same way. I know it's not healthy but I'm afraid to let go and feel the emotion because I don't know how far it'll take us, or if we'll come back from it.

That sounds really stupid when I type it out, but that's the fear. What if we start crying and never stop? Because it feels like a never stop sort of thing.

He really was a good Dad.

Sassy

Hi ELL and welcome to Mosiac Minds.
My Dad died a couple of years ago, but some days it just feels like yesterday. I know the feeling of being afraid of crying and never stopping. I find that it just comes out in little spurts. I still have a hard time dealing with it at times. I do believe Grief is a process with many different stages. I was in the anger stage for very long time and sometimes I still get stuck there, I guess that is because for me anger was always safer to express than hurt or pain.
Maybe if you have someone close to you, you can try to let go a little bit with them and see if they can help you through it. The first time is always the scariest because of the feelings.......

Sitting with you.
Offering a fuzzy blanket and hot cup of tea.....if you drink that sort of thing.