Newbie Loved One With Probable DID

[KoalaGirl]

Hopefully this reply or an alert to it gets to everyone who was on this thread. I'm a little tech challenged.

I could be wrong. It's just...there's so many more layers than even what I mentioned here. This volume I've written is actually the "short" version.

I know what you mean about it being a disorder of hiddenness. He absolutely is hiding something. He knows something is wrong. He has referred to himself as fractured and broken...then evil. I've always told him that isn't true. I am almost certain he suspects DID because he has done extensive research - he claimed for a book he was working on. Although a zombie with DID might be a very unique plotline, I'm pretty sure that's not the way he's going with it.

He said he thinks he doesn't have amnesia episodes, but I think he does & is either in denial or doesn't realize it. I think he is aware or suspects he has lost time and is afraid of what he does during those periods, and he struggles to piece it together based on people's reactions to him and evidence he finds that even he can't refute had to be something he did.

He has done a number of utterly inexplicable things for which he has the oddest explanations. He seemed to lie about things that were completely irrefutable, yet he was insistent he wasn't lying.

A couple of times he was ready to open up about something, then quickly shut down & ducked out - literally disappeared from our chat, then came back like a different person, deflecting, accusing, and oddly hostile. I realized that unconsciously, I've been referring to "Core Tex" and "Other Tex" since long before I ever thought it could be DID - even asking if he had a twin he hadn't told me about; telling him I didn't know who this guy was, but to tell Tex to get in touch with me when he got back.

I'm going to send him some books, articles, & some printouts from a blog that a young woman with DID runs. I'm going to write up a little about what I've observed and reiterate that I'm here for him. But I do realize he has to want to figure it out & fix it himself. I just want him to know that it doesn't mean that he's crazy or weak or that nothing can be done. On the contrary, I am afraid his problems stem from trying to deny these fragmented parts of his psyche/ego a voice. From what I've read, they at least want or need to become aware of each other and be allowed to work together in a system vs always fighting for an ounce of control or say in anything.

I should/will probably post this part under another subject to get a wider audience -- it's about what I believe but can't confirm are his alters engaging me, and how I suspect they have been showing me enough pieces of him to try to get me to notice. (That's oversimplified, I know.)