newbe

[talkingheads]

Hello, I am new here but am feeling some hope for the first time in a long time because I have not had anyone to talk to about having DID. I don't like to visit with friends anymore because I never know when a trigger is going to happen or I go into a trance like state. I'm afraid to tell anyone because of reactions I may receive and it's all just a lot to handle alone. I was finally diagnosed last March and it's taken until now to reach out. I am just recently meeting some of my parts, I only know the name of one, Steven, he's and angry 17 year old. I know of two others, a teenage girl and a young girl about 7 years of age who is very strong willed and speaks her mind. I believe she says the words I was to afraid to say. I do not know their names, but I can see what they look like. I hear others talk and even argue, but they have not spoken directly to me. Most of the time, I wish my alters would just give me those horrible memories of most I don't remember so I can deal with it and head toward healing. I'm not sure which part/alter has given me some memories. I have found some writings I must have wrote but it's not my writing. However the things I read made some sense and put a couple pieces of the puzzle together. And yet when I read them, it scares me and sometimes I see other children begging me to help them. Well this is enough for now, I hope nothing here is inappropriate. Thank you for allowing me to participate in this forum. My hope is to be able to learn how to cope with DID, get opinions, suggestions, and get some relief by sharing what is happening to me. Talkingheads