poetry: The Definition of My Pain (TW)

[Dreamscapes Collectives]

The Definition of My Pain

I have been a victim
a casualty of others’ rage and twisted sadistic minds
a sacrifice on the altar of their selfishness
I have been broken
shattered by the horrors I had to endure
fragmented by the torment and pain of my own mind
demoralized by the words and actions of those meant to protect
I have been lost
drowning in the pit of my despair
cut adrift in a sea of loss, of innocence, of sanity
of the very meaning of safety
I have been wounded
the scars on my body and soul will always be there
the damage will never fully heal
I am a survivor
of things that would have destroyed others
of things that have destroyed others
but -
I am not strong
I am not brave
I merely exist
the only thing that keeps the breath in my body
and my soul tethered to this plane
is the need to keep anyone else
from having to endure that which has made me
what I have become
for that alone I continue
in pain,
in despair
crying silent invisible tears
hoping, praying
my travesty of a life
can save someone else
from the suffering I live in daily
without end.