Bad for so many reasons

[The People]

We got an email last night from someone saying she could make coffee on Monday if I was free but then she is gone for a month. I have a very narrow window on Mondays and told her that. She was going to talk to the now boss at the place where I used to work under her. Due to the fact that she had put off contacting me for so long I assumed that it is a no and I had decided that I didn't want to go there again anyway. I started to tell her why and all of the things I had kept inside just spilled. One included referring a friend there and him getting treated like sh*t (she told him how busy she was and talked very little about him.) He gave up after that. I was so angry but I was not in a position to let it go I lost that friend a few months ago. One cannot blame any one person for the death of another but as I put it she cut one of his life lines. Said I wish I could have just taken him on myself as I am good at pulling rabbits out of hats but one needs a name behind them.

Then last night, while I was still writing this letter actually, a woman started doing a number on the apartment door next to me. I looked out and she said "It's my place and I have a friend in there and he is passed out." She kept banging; worse. I called the owner. Told him it was either him or a cop. He said no don't do that and asked me to hand her my phone. He talked to her and she was oh so nice and how I had over reacted after 2 minutes and then one minute. After she hung up she got worse and it was like I was the one who locked her out.

The couple across the hall are older and would have been very frightened. So I stuck a note under the door saying it was being handled. And one under the door of the single Mom downstairs. Today the woman across the hall thanked me profusely because he wasn't there that night and she was beside herself. So I did something right. And as I was on my way downstairs with the other note I passed him in the hallway. The guy who was supposed to be passed out on the couch. Clean and sober. She started telling him off and her time spent raising the roof was reduced to 1/2 a minute.... oy. I slipped a detailed note into the mailbox giving him more details and how I left notes for the other people who would be scared.

We did not sleep well. Two coloured for a bit in her H'oponopono book and then we fell asleep to the TV. Our phone never rings and 2 calls right around 9. One after another. I guess 9 is considered to be an appropriate time to call people who live a normal life. I should have turned it off.

There is more but I am so tired of f*ck*ng up or people f*ck*ng up and me ending up looking like sh*t. And me going off with my fingers on the keys and...

I just wrote my T and PDoc. Told them some of it (PDoc already knows some.) Said maybe I wasn't ready to go back to work as I am tired of being blunt and honest with people and them getting pissed off and making my life miserable. I do good things. But Alexa and some others have a bad temper. We still switch away more than we are aware and there are repercussions from coming off meds. Repercussions being on them.

Life is a no win. Not a threat just no hope.

[MakersDozn]

Just wanted you to know that we hear you.

MDs

[The People]

(09-22-2013, 02:22 PM)MakersDozn Wrote: Just wanted you to know that we hear you.

MDs

Thanks buddy.