Holiday Panic

[Shadows]

We hate the holidays. No good decision on what to do. FOO is awful to be near but being alone is hard too.

And what we hate the most is that the whole world seems to stop for a week and a half and it is impossible to have appointments or take care of anything or do anything other than be with family or alone.

We just want to fast forward to January; January is always so much easier.

In the meantime, we have so much panic we feel like we will throw up.

[nats]

we've largely given up on visiting FOO, b/c we usually end up feeling worse than having not visited. this year we're spending time doing what we want - e.g. catching up on books and tv series and writing. very nice so far

[The People]

We are house sitting animals which are the best Christmas company. Friends have sent us gifts. We would be fine just staying like this but we go out for dinner on Christmas night with friends -Octogenarians. I help them out a lot and am pretty much like family. I took Ruth shopping for her husband today. I really didn't want to but she never knows what will be the last Christmas for him. That is sad but they have had 60 years together. Their one son has MI. But we get along fine.
I have reconnected with a sister who struggles. She sent me gifts and they all feel like journals. She fell apart after the male PU d**d.

You don't have to be with FOO. And as an adult you can set a time limit if you do go. You are an adult now. In the meantime do something that makes you feel good. Stick whatever you can afford into your local food bank. Shovel a driveway for a senior. Go for a run with your dog if you have one or visit a pet store if you don't. Animals are known to produce... something that results in happiness.

You have us. You have yourself. I will check in when I can. Just look after yourself if that means telling them that you are sick or whatever. Find peace anywhere you can.

[The People]

I love this photo as it is so peaceful.

[Shadows]

Thank you . everyone. We are trying to stay calm. About to head to FOO but not for the abusers but for our siblings that have to go and have no choice - feels like an important thing to support them.

But we set limits and will be there only a little over 24 hours. Then we are cat sitting for two friends when we get back home so that will be nice,

We are trying hard. We just can't wait for January. I know everyone else things January is sad but for us it always feels like such a relief.

[The People]

That is great that you set limits and have a legitimate reason to leave.