Nona yourbusiness!

[The People]

People feel the need to ask us why we shake. Some will even ask if it is meds or whatever. We started shaking at 3. Many family members do and that is why it is called a familial tremor and they don't know what brings it on. Well maybe a large level of craziness. I always want to make a smart remark like '"we had a quart of vodka for breakfast" but we feel so embarrassed. The anger comes later.

[dreamers]

you could try " i don't know... lots of people's bodies do things that they don't understand... that's why med researchers will always have jobs. However this happens often enough that I know it's not an emergency" Sometimes when people ask "why" they really mean " you won't d*e will you?!" and they just need to hear " I am fairly sure that the answer is 'not yet' but thanks for asking"

my feet swell 3 sizes bigger shoe wise occasionally and people ask "why" and i don't know but most of the time why really means " will you kick it or will your feet fall off?" once they hear I have been checked and rechecked and it evidently just happens, but it doesn't mean anything emergent they stop asking

[The People]

No there is usually a follow up question like "are you on medication?" And while I try to pretend that the shakes aren't that bad they must be if people notice them. But it is none of their business so I don't feel the need to be polite.

[dreamers]

ok just trying help and yes with some people ( like my house keeper) i feel the same about my feet. shes not a friend but my employee. I think at least for me it's different when friends ask. I get follow questions too which I think are my friends why of " trying to help solve the mystery. If a true friend is doing that i typically say " if a team of specialists can't figure it out I doubt we can but thanks for trying I know you mean well. Still, it makes me think my feet are making you uncomfortable when you keep suggesting different things. I don't want to make you ill-at-ease and I can't will my feet to shrink. So can we please change topics"

if its not a close friend I am less polite... sorry if i stepped on toes

[The People]

Not to worry. Like you I am more comfortable with friends but interestingly enough they are less likely to ask. That woman never met me before.