I used to draw

[Cammy]

One thing I find very frustrating with DID is that just before I became who I am now, I did a lot of sketching and artwork. My previous host had a talent for art, and I do not. It is awful not being able to express myself as well artistically as I did previously. I must say, she really did some competent artwork, and I remember how absorbing and relaxing drawing was. If I try to draw now with this host, the artwork is terrible, almost juvenile, and totally lacks any scintilla of talent whatsoever. I find that extremely frustrating. I never realized before that not all of my skills come across with me to new personalities, and I think it is kind of awful.

Has anyone else here had this experience, or is it just me?

[nats]

growing up we always drew and painted. we were excellent. could have been professional. don't know at what point it stopped but once we became adult and left home it did. we have no interest in art or picking up a pencil. don't have the patience or desire. never once thought about it being someone else with the talent. hmmm.

[Cammy]

Thanks nats. Yes, it is a thing to think about - whether the actual talent is stuck with a particular host, or if, as in your case, it is the desire that is now absent. I guess I will find out when/if others respond to this post. I am glad that certain things are retained from personality to personality like driving a car, bathing and clothing myself, work place skills, etcetera. I just find it very interesting that it is something that I love doing for myself that has gone missing on me. Hmmmm. I don't know if I'll ever get this one figured out.

[nats]

it would be wrong to say i don't want to. i would love to draw and paint as i used to. i think it's more accurate to say i'm not able so have convinced myself i don't miss it much..

[Cammy]

Ah...I see what you are saying. And there's the rub - rationalizing the loss of the skill by telling yourself you don't really wish to do it anyway. I understand.

[nats]

[Cammy]

Well, I finally found a medium that works for me a bit better. While I have lost my skills for sketching and water color, I found that I can do okay art on an app on my computer. At least now I can once experience that total absorption while enjoying the act of doing art. Why the computer, I have no idea. It isn't even precise or easy to do, but I seem to like it and spend hours at it now. How odd. The main thing is I am having fun, and boy, fun is definitely to be embraced wherever and whenever it can be found.

[nats]

enjoy it!

[Cammy]

I will nats - while it lasts (LOL).

[The People]

That is great. I used to know someone where only one alter drew. The front alter was more into music. I think when the walls between alters become thinner it gets easier to share. That being said I do find writing to be difficult when certain alters are out. it changes the quality of what I am working on.

[nats]

oh my goodness yes. causes real problems when we have a deadline!!