My Husband Has DID too

[Cammy]

I married over a year ago only to discover that my husband has DID and PTSD from being brutalized in on multiple different levels all throughout his childhood. He still has large chunks of his life that are hidden behind amnesia barriers. It has been SO interesting in that I have become his guide into the world of being a multiple, and watching him become more aware of his alters plus helping him navigate his inner world has been both fascinating and gratifying.

This process of guidance reminds me a great deal of what mosaic minds does for those who find themselves here, especially people who are newly realized to their 'condition'. I am so grateful for this community, and even though I may not often visit, the knowledge that this site exists and that there are others like me, is comforting and supportive. As my husband pointed out to me, "No one has ever understood me like you do".  And so it is with MM: no one can understand us like others who share being multiple.  Thank heavens for this site - none of us ever have to feel isolated in our uniqueness, but instead can come here to find understanding and possibly even celebrate our multiplicity.

[The People]

Cool Igraine? Does he want to come and chat here too? Or is it your hidey hole? You sound happy.

KA @------------->-

[Cammy]

(07-07-2016, 11:26 PM)The People Wrote: Cool Igraine? Does he want to come and chat here too? Or is it your hidey hole? You sound happy.

KA @------------->-

Hi People,
   In answer to your question - he does not use this website for support. Since he is so new to the discovery of his multiplicity (2 years now), he pretty much relies upon me for support and to answer questions. Should he run into serious problems, I have an excellent T who has spent decades helping multiples and teaching other professionals about it. So far my hubby, Wayne, seems content to let me be his guide into this new realization. He knows about MM, and he knows that he is more than welcome to come here if he desires. I think that one of the things that make us seek each other out on this site is the fact that we are so very isolated within ourselves with no one near to us who can even remotely relate. This is why I came here, and continue to do so. It is a lovely reminder to me that I am not alone. With Wayne, he already has me, so the motivation to seek out this community is much less powerful than it is for many of us. However, that may change.
     For myself, I found it a little unusual at first to find out my spouse has DID, and that I was walking in unchartered territory. But again, there are other people on this site who also have significant others who are also multiples. It is good to know that I can enlist the help of their experiences and in turn they can help me should things crop up. The value of this community and the support it affords is invaluable. 
   I also wanted to thank you for the kind words you left me in another post regarding the passing of my dog. For Wayne it was devastating, and for the first time in his life he felt safe enough to openly grieve, rather than suppress and compartmentalize his pain. He is already asking me to get another little Scottie female that can be his very special personal buddy. I hope to contact my breeder and get him one in the fall. It is just a little too early right now. But, I have already selected a name - she will be called Abigail, with Abby for short. A goodly Scottish name!  So thank you again people for reaching out with empathy and sensitivity. I would also like to express my sympathy for the kitties you lost, and which for you probably still seems like yesterday. I am hoping that Two can slowly come to terms with the grief and start to heal as well.
     Wishing you the best. You are good people, People!
Affectionately.....Igraine

[The People]

Thanks Igraine. I agree about giving it some time between new pets. We did get another cat because our doctor thought it was good. Turned out it wasn't for many reasons, one being that Two was just not ready.

I am glad you and your husband found each other and feel that you are able to support each other. I remember a long while back having a discussion here about multies. Some people have gaydar. Many multies have multiedar. We don't always recognize what is drawing us to the other person at first but we do eventually. I met several in the small community I lived in before I came here. We sort of did a circle dance around each other at first but soon figured it out.

[Cammy]

(07-09-2016, 03:55 PM)The People Wrote: Thanks Igraine. I agree about giving it some time between new pets. We did get another cat because our doctor thought it was god. Turned out it wasn't for many reasons, one being that Two was just not ready.

I am glad you and your husband found each other and feel that you are able to support each other. I remember a long while back having a discussion here about multies. Some people have gaydar. Many multies have multiedar. We don't always recognize what is drawing us to the other person at first but we do eventually. I met several in the small community I lived in before I came here. We sort of did a circle dance around each other at first but soon figured it out.

Through the years it has never ceased to amaze me that I can 'sense' when someone else is a multiple. I also have a radar for people with BPD for some reason. A lot of times it turns out, it is the way they dress. My husband's wardrobe is strictly black, just like mine. My T told me that a lot of multiples prefer black as their main wardrobe. Mind you, it was more than this that attracted me to Wayne, but in retrospect, there are so many little things that he does that I do too. I'm just glad I found someone that can relate to me and I to him, just like when I am here at MM there are thankfully others who know what the heck I am going through or even talking about.