Jan and moving
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The People Offline
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#1
Jan and moving
After a huge fight with the landlord we decided it was time to move. This is a weird building. I lived in a city that was populated with Maritimers for 22 years and everyone (well most people) were friendly and helpful. People like that are few and far between here.

The landlord breaks all the rules and as a result Jan has taken over. And the landlord does not want us to deal with him. He wants us to deal with the office. We texted him twice and he said not to do it again.

He is being an *ss but hard headed and no hearted Jan is not helping matters as she always has to cross the line. She is the one who has been fighting with him. It does not excuse the behaviour of us but as well it just makes a stressful situation more stressful. It just dawned on me that it was she who is causing the issues. Jan is 26ish and is our wall when we have had enough. Causes issues however.

Our new place is just a bachelor but we hardly use the whole apartment as both TV and computer are in bedroom. The sense of life in the new place is so much better (we have been approved) and we cannot wait to be gone. Will rent a U-Haul to move big stuff and friend with truck will help with smaller stuff.

But what to do about Jan?
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01-06-2014, 10:13 PM
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MakersDozn Offline
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#2
Friendship/Support  RE: Jan and moving
At first we thought you meant "Jan" as in "January." But then we remembered that you have someone inside named Jan. No idea on what to advise about her takeover, though.

What is a "bachelor" apartment?

Good luck,

MDs
01-07-2014, 01:10 AM
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The People Offline
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RE: Jan and moving
Bachelor is combination bedroom living room with full bath and kitchen. Usually smaller square footage which is why I need to get rid of stuff.
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01-07-2014, 02:22 AM
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Tangled Web Offline
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RE: Jan and moving
I am glad you found a place and that you are moving. Sorry to hear about Jan.....that can be difficult and I have no idea how to handle those situations either. Hopefully she will pull back once you are moved and everything settles down a little....that is usually the only time things changes for us in those kinds of situations.

TW
"You may not remember what someone says or does, but you will never forget how they made you feel" Mac Anderson.
(This post was last modified: 01-07-2014, 02:25 AM by Tangled Web.)
01-07-2014, 02:24 AM
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nats Offline
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RE: Jan and moving
(01-07-2014, 02:22 AM)The People Wrote: Bachelor is combination bedroom living room with full bath and kitchen. Usually smaller square footage which is why I need to get rid of stuff.

ah ok, that's what we call a 'studio' in UK. great that you've got a new better place and a moving plan/date - that sounds like a big relief. Jan will probably settle once she's not needed as much, but in terms of her own personal growth and finding better ways to fight (i.e. negotiate with difficult people) that probably requires practice. are you able to talk to her at all and make suggestions about more useful ways to engage with the landlord? changing habits is hard for any of us!
Blush Learn how to manage conflict, because the greater the level you can tolerate, the more freedom you will retain - E. Walsh Smile
01-08-2014, 06:04 AM
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MakersDozn Offline
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RE: Jan and moving
(01-08-2014, 06:04 AM)nats Wrote:
(01-07-2014, 02:22 AM)The People Wrote: Bachelor is combination bedroom living room with full bath and kitchen. Usually smaller square footage which is why I need to get rid of stuff.

ah ok, that's what we call a 'studio' in UK.

We call it a studio here in the States too.

The People: Thanks for explaining.

MDs
01-08-2014, 04:38 PM
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The People Offline
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RE: Jan and moving
(01-08-2014, 06:04 AM)nats Wrote:
(01-07-2014, 02:22 AM)The People Wrote: Bachelor is combination bedroom living room with full bath and kitchen. Usually smaller square footage which is why I need to get rid of stuff.

ah ok, that's what we call a 'studio' in UK. great that you've got a new better place and a moving plan/date - that sounds like a big relief. Jan will probably settle once she's not needed as much, but in terms of her own personal growth and finding better ways to fight (i.e. negotiate with difficult people) that probably requires practice. are you able to talk to her at all and make suggestions about more useful ways to engage with the landlord? changing habits is hard for any of us!

Jan goes off to her own corner of the castle and paints (no talent externally) when things settle. We stop existing. Something else to work on but with high numbers in our castle we have a few who we have never been able to reach. She is one. Thanks for the feedback.
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01-08-2014, 05:00 PM
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The People Offline
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RE: Jan and moving
(01-08-2014, 06:04 AM)nats Wrote:
(01-07-2014, 02:22 AM)The People Wrote: Bachelor is combination bedroom living room with full bath and kitchen. Usually smaller square footage which is why I need to get rid of stuff.

ah ok, that's what we call a 'studio' in UK. great that you've got a new better place and a moving plan/date - that sounds like a big relief. Jan will probably settle once she's not needed as much, but in terms of her own personal growth and finding better ways to fight (i.e. negotiate with difficult people) that probably requires practice. are you able to talk to her at all and make suggestions about more useful ways to engage with the landlord? changing habits is hard for any of us!

See above re Jan. Sometimes it is called a studio here as well; see that quite often in ads. Actually I think studio sounds better. Bachelor probably stems from a time where women who moved out of home boarded some place or lived in an all female apt. Only men lived on their own. Just a guess.
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(This post was last modified: 01-08-2014, 05:03 PM by The People.)
01-08-2014, 05:02 PM
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MakersDozn Offline
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Doing okay  RE: Jan and moving
(01-08-2014, 05:02 PM)The People Wrote: Bachelor probably stems from a time where women who moved out of home boarded some place or lived in an all female apt. Only men lived on their own. Just a guess.

Good point!

MDs
01-12-2014, 10:12 PM
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