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+--- Thread: multiple battles (/showthread.php?tid=2001)
multiple battles - nats - 12-19-2015
our system has always struggled with this constant need to fight - numerous battles both important and trivial - with the outside world. nobody seems to have taught us when to walk away and not jump in. age and experience has taught us a lot, but the default still seems to be to jump in when we see something unfair and then try to work out how to get out of the mess we then find ourselves in
our goal for the next year is to prioritise better - so, not to start the unimportant battles in the first place. the reality is, you can't fight a war on multiple fronts - no matter how willing, righteous, or talented you are. we have to focus and put our efforts into the things that really matter, where success would make a difference.
do others have this problem and how have you dealt with it?
RE: multiple battles - MakersDozn - 12-21-2015
When we were young, we were very passive in most situations. We did not fight back, with the exception of a few of us complaining to our parents now and then.
Because we were so passive, people outside of the family (classmates, etc), walked all over us. This is why some in our system are combative or oppositional in the present day.
It's hard to work through this. We live in flashback mode more than we realize. We let our past hurts influence our current behavior. But we're learning to process all of this....slowly, but at least we're working on it.
MDs
RE: multiple battles - The People - 12-21-2015
Yesterday someone we rely on to be honest said that we have an 'edge'. It is true. We can be very kind but some can be very sharp toward people we deem to be stupid. People who are mean for no reason, who are prejudiced. People who flaunt their Christian values and then say cruel things about someone who actually lives them. And sometimes we are just having a really bad day and we become the fire breathing dragon you see at the left. We hate that aspect of the selves. We could say some people deserve it but in being a dragon we bring ourselves down to their level.
RE: multiple battles - MakersDozn - 12-29-2015
[...]we have an 'edge'. It is true. We can be very kind but some can be very sharp toward people we deem to be stupid. [...]And sometimes we are just having a really bad day and we become the fire breathing dragon you see at the left.
We really identify with this.
MDs
RE: multiple battles - nats - 02-07-2016
actually, for whoever wrote this, sometimes it is important to fight those battles. sometimes the only way out is through. more often than not, we don't get into battles we didn't need to get into. we have to keep going.
RE: multiple battles - The People - 02-08-2016
It is true Nats. We are here as 'us' because it was our only way to fight back. In so many ways we are way behind monominds with regards to self-defence, when to get involved etc. Practice really doesn't make perfect but it helps us grow stronger, feel safer.