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Hi - WeAreKaren - 12-19-2015
Hi. I became aware about a year ago that I am the Host part of a multi-part personality. During the year just past, I've been grieving the unexpected breakup of a long-term relationship, as well as coming to terms with the new reality of my childhood, and processing memories (among other things :-).
The holidays are really tough this year because of the "double whammy" I received last year. (I was pretty numb last year; not so much this year.) I and some of my other parts are hoping to be able to chat with people with whom we can be "all that we are" and get some support as well.
Karen Rose (Host of WeAreKaren)
RE: Hi - nats - 12-19-2015
hi Karen Rose,
welcome to the forums! that sounds really hard. as the People pointed out, it's really quiet here right now. some of us try to check in regularly though so feel free to post, ask questions, and get to know the place.
hope you can find a way to be kind to yourself this holiday season.
RE: Hi - MakersDozn - 12-21-2015
Welcome, Karen Rose and all. We're glad that you've joined us, and we hope that you like it here.
MDs
RE: Hi - The People - 12-21-2015
Hi Karen Rose. welcome! Glad you felt comfortable introducing yourself. I posted earlier that it can get quiet at Christmas but a few of us do peek in as we tend to have quiet Christmases. So drop a line when you feel like it and some of us we most likely pop by to respond. S sorry Christmas is a double whammy for you. I hope you find away to take away some of the sting.
Every year we tend to buy ourselves something to help Santa. We just bought some new books before Christmas but we are getting pressured to go out and get something else. Perhaps something small non-candy as we ate a tonne of Quality Street already! We would get a cat if we could but not an option so we have friends' cat and dogs as they gather as a family out of town. The house is all decorated and we have gifts from them under the tree. It still doesn't work but for us it is better than hiding. For us. everyone gets through difficult times in their own way.
RE: Hi - WeAreKaren - 03-03-2016
I decided to reply to my original introduction rather than start a new thread. I was elsewhere for the holidays because they had more activity. Then I just kept posting there for a while. But now I am back. I'll also note that at the time I originally posted, I signed my post "Karen Rose" and said she was the Host. That was during a short time period when what has normally been what I call a Revolving, Tripartite host was fused. I thought it would be more stable, but it turned out not to be the case. So I'm back to three Host parts that switch places rapidly and mostly seamlessly. The three Host parts are Karen Rose, Penny, and Dark Karen.
However, you can just call me Karen. This is because I have recently decided to go back to calling myself "I". I view myself as a multi-part personality acting in an integrated fashion, rather than a collection of multiple personalities acting independently. So to me that means "I". At times some of my parts may make separate posts and sign with their name. If they do, of course feel free to address them by their name. Otherwise, my posts will simply be signed "Karen". Or if I forget to sign, then you can assume Karen.
I look forward to participating more in this community as the weeks go by. I am in a heavy memory processing period right now, but will post as I have time and energy to do so.
Karen
RE: Hi - The People - 03-03-2016
We are Karen we too have 3 part leadership. We also run fairly smoothly unless there is a sump in the road. I think we can tell much better from the inside who is out front.
RE: Hi - nats - 03-03-2016
there are a lot of threes in our system (e.g. internal leadership), but the fronting team as it now operates isn't one of them. we like your avatar Karen
RE: Hi - WeAreKaren - 03-03-2016
Hi The People and nats. It's interesting that you have threes as well.
I've been reading a book on sensory defensiveness called "too loud, too bright, too fast, too tight, what to do if you are sensory defensive in an overstimulating world". (BTW, sensory defensiveness is one of several collections of disorders that fall under the umbrella term Sensory Processing Disorder or SPD, which used to be called Sensory Integration Disorder.) Before getting to what to do, the author (Sharon Heller, Ph.D.) first describes the what and the why. Part One describes the symptoms (which can vary from person to person). Part Two talks about how the brain is organized, what is "wrong" in the brain to cause sensory defensiveness, and contributing factors in the womb and after you're born that lead to various coping behaviors. Anyway, I found a very interesting paragraph in Part Two that made me wonder if it might be the reason behind all the threes in my system, rather than just chance or something related to a specific trauma. (See, I wasn't wandering off on an unrelated tangent, LOL.) Here it is:
"As outlined by neuroanatomist Paul MacLean, a brain researcher at the National Institute of Mental Health, our 'triune brain' consists of distinct, hierarchically organized levels that correspond to the evolution of the human species from lower animal form: the brain stem, the most primitive, communicates with motions; the limbic system, with emotions; and the cerebrum, with words. How these brain parts comingle is a mystery. But somehow they function as an integrated whole and reciprocally influence each other." So I'm thinking that might be the reason three figures so heavily in my system. It is "natural".
What do you think? Have you found any pattern or reason behind your "threes"? Oh and I meant to say, thanks nats for the compliment on my avatar.
RE: Hi - The People - 03-05-2016
We don't know why we 3 are front runners for our many. We have triplets as well. They are red dot children, all of them coming on the same evening. At that age we used to read books about trilets. Flicka Ricka Dicka and Snip Snap and Snur. Our triplets are Peak Rachel and Patricia. We think they came at the same time to deal with the evening and chose to be triplets because we loved books, hid in books. They look nothing alike and roles are different.
There have been others here in the past that had groups of three that worked together. Our triplets really don't. One doesn't even show herself at all. One rarely and another comes and goes.
RE: Hi - nats - 03-05-2016
also don't know why 3 but know it is somehow an important or 'natural' configuration. like someone said, like a stool it's the smallest stable number of legs for standing, but that's more a justification than an explanation. other people in here might know, but they've never given an explanation that i could understand.
RE: Hi - WeAreKaren - 03-05-2016
The People, your threes are different than mine. I don't have "triplets". What I often have are three parts that rotate handling a particular role. For example, I have three host parts. I have three guardians of the Inner Circle (the safe place at the center of my mind where the kids reside and where others of us go from time to time). I have three "shadows" whose job includes helping me remember daily stuff and stay in my body, coordinating all the parts that mitigate the effects of my SPD, and serving as first-line protectors of the host. I have three managers. And when memories arrive, it's usually happens after three or multiples of three parts come together outside of the "memory wall" that holds all the memories that until recently were buried so deep I had no clue that I'd had other than a happy childhood.
nats and others, Yes I've read various things that indicate that three is a number of stability and yet also flexibility. I've also had various theories having to do with what might be at the root of a trauma anniversary that I haven't yet had memories of. And most recently I ran across the "triune brain" reference I cited earlier. In the end it probably doesn't matter. But as I like to say, inquiring minds want to know. ;-) It could very well be a different reason for each person, since our systems are all so different. But who knows. Systems of people across culture and language boundaries also have some common characteristics, because we are all human. Ah well. It's just sort of fun to speculate, I guess.
RE: Hi - The People - 03-05-2016
we may have 3 Guardians of the Inner Circle as well come to think of it. Gabriel, Michael and a Giant who is simply referred to as The Guardian. The only one who comes out is Gabriel and it is rare. When we three front runners are at a loss. Like the time we fired a psychiatrist. Someone came out and stayed very calm but was firm when we stated that he was not helping us, not keeping his promises. Told him to just go away.
RE: Hi - nats - 03-06-2016
yours sounds somewhat like ours Karen. there was originally a fronting team of three, but one is sociopathic and got shut away somewhere, the other is extremely depressed and avoids the front unless things are really difficult, and i'm more of a fragment than a person - kind of a multi in a multi system if you will - and only came into being to do the caregiving stuff. I've had to develop a bit beyond that, but if i'm honest my abilities and interests are still limited. i sit with another fragment who keeps track of time and there are/were others in front as well, but i'm not really aware of them.
RE: Hi - argent - 03-28-2016
Hi, WeAreKaren!